Quick Summary

I haven't been around here much these days - I'll get back to that later.
I did meet my goal to be nice on a daily basis - and got quite some niceness in return.

What I did in August:

- Daily greetings.
- Letting people in a hurry cut the line in a supermarket.
- Asking a total stranger if she enjoys her work.
- Freed a goat from a piece of rope the poor thing got it's head stuck in. Basically it was accidentally tied to a gate this way.
- Locked the car door of someone who apparently forgot to do so.
- Held the elevator.
- Held the door.
- Gave directions to tourists.
- Told 2 new Amsterdammers who were looking for a place to practice yoga where to go.
- Helped someone with material for her research, see her comment in this post.
- Brought a bouncing todler from the pavement back to her mum inside a store.
- Been an absolute great tipper, as always.

As you can imagine, this was easy peasy, lemon squeezy.
Barely cost any time, barely cost any Euro's.
And very happy and proud to still be on the right track for my project of being a perfect stranger for 365 days in a row!

London Riots

Yes, reclaiming the streets, one step at a time. It's easier said than done, when looking at the riots in Great Britain.

Why did those riots start? Was it absence of faith, hope, fathers, direction? Was it because crime pays? Was it because commercials raise greedy consumerists? Was it because English politicians have done a lousy job taking care of certain groups? Was it because the police was unprepared? Was it because of racism?

Quite frankly, I don't know, but I'm sure of one thing: there are multiple reasons people misbehaved, and one of them is that people these days seem to think they're entitled to anything and everything.

Why did they loot? Simple. Because they could.

It's hard for me to think that people can do this to each other; people didn't just lose their house or shop, people got killed. It's mindblowing to think that this could happen almost anywhere in Europe.

I find it hard to focus on the good side of people in times like these; humans tend to be disappointing in so many ways. But that's obviously not what this blog is about. So let's have a good look at some of the nicer things that happened right after the riots.

People picked up brooms for the riot cleanup, some folks realized police had been working 30 hour shifts and might like themselves an oh so British cup of tea, and saving the best for last this initiative to help an 89 year old barber rebuild his barber shop that was ransacked by very brave kids indeed.

Just saying 'hi'

The easiest way to be kind to a stranger is just saying 'hi'. I didn't just happen to write about a bus ride in my first post as just an example, I'm on a bus on a daily basis as I travel to and from work. And every time I get on I say 'hi' to the bus driver and when I get off I say thank you and wish the bus driver a nice day or evening.

As I said, that is, very, very easy. But why greet just the bus driver? Why won't I acknowledge the presence of all my fellow commuters? Some of them answer their calls politely and loud, so I know their first name. I even know that a young woman lives with a roommate whom she tells to buy certain groceries and I know how they both hate cleaning the apartment and are very happy on a not so regular basis to have 'finally cleaned the entire kitchen.'

I know one guy has a dog and lives in a fabulous apartment not too far from mine. Someone else was very dissapointed by a friend whom she ended a call with only after shouting she thought this friend was 'a very bad judge of character!' A blonde in a navy blue trenchcoat never, ever wears any other shoes but her black pumps with low heels. And I know one woman got pregnant and is now on mat leave. Or really she had ballooned and from one day to the next she wasn't on the bus anymore, so I came to the mat leave conclusion myself.

But we never speak. And that's OK. But we also never say 'hello'. And why not, for heaven's sake? I'm probably going to put more thinking into reasons behind the behaviour, but for now I will settle for starting to say 'hi' to my fellow straphangers. 

Reclaiming the Streets

It was one of those rainy autumn days in the Netherlands, one of those rainy days where there's no hiding from a drop as it is absolutely pouring down, all over your face, down your neck, if unlucky your shoes... And I saw this woman as only Dutch women can look in the rain; soaked and bent over her bike like a hunchback.

For a second, our eyes met. We recognized the miserable state we brought ourselves in. Thinking this horrible weather was a personal insult. I cracked up first. Then she broke into a big smile. The hunchback disappeared and got replaced by a self confident, happy -oh, the hell with it - type of blonde, who was going to take on that day from that moment on like there was no tomorrow.

That is what this blog is about.

About connection. With perfect strangers. About becoming that perfect stranger.

Why?

Because I had to go all the way back into the 90ies for this lovely memory.

Because I don't like the way we treat each other these days. Like we are not strangers, but instead, like Patrick Bateman, we are simply not there. Or rather The Others are simply not there. We ignore each other on the sidewalk. In our favourite cafe we slouch our hunchback over our cup of coffee and our iPhone or iPad. We are all alone on a bus so full of people that it takes tremendous effort to pretend not to notice each  other. We are not standing in line at the grocery store with other people and God forbid we'd say 'hi' to anyone on the elevator.

I'm starting this blog because I thought it is easy to be nice. Or is it? I want to prove it is. I am going to be nice in some shape, way or form to someone I don't or barely know on a daily basis for a year. And keep you posted. I'm also going to keep you posted on all the nice things strangers do for me or people around me. Because in all honesty, despite my little rant in the previous paragraph, lots of anonymous folks are changing the world by being friendly, helping or understanding. You're probably one of them, or you wouldn't be reading this. Let's reclaim the streets.